“It isn’t what happens to us that causes us to suffer; it’s what we say to ourselves about what happens.”
Do you feel that your life is falling apart and you are overburdened? You’re not alone. Everyone goes through difficult periods. This guide offers doable actions to assist you in overcoming such difficult situations. Learn valuable techniques to manage your stress, gain perspective, and regain control of your life. Discover how to use setbacks to your advantage to become more resilient. Face the challenges of life and come out stronger than before.
1. Instead of asking, “Why me?” ask, “What next?”
let’s ask ourselves, ‘What next?’ This simple change can inspire a new perspective and motivate us to take control of our circumstances.
It’s normal; when anything goes wrong, we usually ask ourselves, “Why me?
The problem is, “Why me?” is a weakening statement. It makes us feel like victims and less capable of handling the circumstances.
We regain control when we purposefully catch ourselves asking, “Why me?” instead of asking, “What next?” and discover what we can do. For instance, if you lose your job, you can start updating your resume and networking for new opportunities instead of dwelling on the unfairness.
After that, my kid would get anxious whenever she had a minor mishap. I would pretend to be quiet, even if I wanted to yell, “Why us? When will we get a break? Please, lament the sad little one. Are you injured? Mishaps occur. Would a boo-boo pad be helpful? Indeed, a boo-boo pad was usually beneficial.
We gradually returned to our previous level of resilience in the face of little mishaps.
2. Make an effort to express gratitude.
No matter the blows, it is not easy to be thankful for it.
The news that my daughter had a broken jaw saddened me. It was almost like I had to force myself to be grateful.
I used to say, “Well, we’re lucky it wasn’t a head injury,” whenever I spoke with someone. After saying it aloud a few times, I genuinely began to believe it and felt thankful, which made it easier to handle hearing about the crooked jaw.
You have much to be thankful for, no matter what you are going through. Make yourself say it aloud several times. Your mind and heart will soon converge.
3. Give up placing blame.
It’s only natural to want to place the blame for your hurt on someone.
In my situation, I was tempted to place the responsibility on others—myself, the playcare’s carers, the emergency room’s doctors, etc.
But placing blame makes the pain worse. It makes letting go more difficult. It corrodes us from the inside out, makes us angry, and infuses our lives with negativity.
So, give up.
Something will occur if it is meant to be. That is all. Take care of it and go on.
4. Refuse to succumb to hopelessness and dread.
This one is difficult. Giving in and giving up to the sadness and dread is so much simpler. Even when we feel two feet too short, we must stand tall.
It was tough for me to appear confident while hiding my anxieties from my kid. But I’m so happy that I did.
At that time, I had begun to question whether something wasn’t quite right. My constant companion, a foreboding fear, kept reminding me that something terrible was happening.
But with time, she absorbed my confidence and became more self-assured. Then, she resumed her nutty activities And stopped experiencing any mishaps.
And my concerns began to fade.
You have to pretend until you make it when it comes to fear and despair. And you’ll succeed sooner or later.
5. Keep trying
We disagreed with the jaw surgery decision. Even though it seemed futile, we sought out a second viewpoint.
The old school was the new oral surgeon. She recommended physical treatment. My daughter, a young but quite athletic child, faithfully completed her exercises. At the same time, we set alarms on the phone.
After a month, the jaw was beginning to realign. Things are starting to take shape. That operation won’t be necessary after all. Our best bet is to hope for the best.
Never give up, no matter where or what you are going through. Try one more thing; perhaps it’s the solution you’re looking for.
Until it’s over, it isn’t over.
The big time is not a place; it’s the state of your heart. It’s not something you get; it’s something you become.
